I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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