yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize