note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize