New low: just hacked my moms facebook
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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