is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize