i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
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Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
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So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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