Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize