She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize