I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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