allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize