im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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