Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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