ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
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