Well apparently he's into motor boating.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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