found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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