hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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