what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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