WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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