let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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