how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
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