had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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