I only kidnapped one of them. chill
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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