she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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