I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize