I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize