She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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