You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize