what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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