Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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