I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize