Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize