we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
and you fell through a lawn chair
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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