No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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