Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
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