Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize