If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize