hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize