I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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