who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
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I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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