i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I have feelings that need drinking.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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