I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Bring me that man meat
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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