Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
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