so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
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