Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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