We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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