But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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