She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
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She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
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We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
please don't ironically join a cult
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