Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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