Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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