We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
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It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
just found out that she named her cat after me.
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I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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